"It's tough work but someone's gotta do it!"

I sabotage best friend's love life

I'm running out of ways to sabotage my best friend's love life.

I try to save her from men for her own good. She is so gullable and naive that she could easily be manipulated if she were to become close to someone with less than desirable motives.

When Victor the Vermin tried to take her away from me I slipped randy rodent porn into his bag and that was the last he ever saw of her beaver.

When Roger the Raver got her into drugs I put human remains in his waste paper bin and her suspicions of cannibalism saved her from cannabism.

When Drago the Doctor asked her to move to Dorchester I slipped paracetamol into his dinnertime drink and gave him a taste of his own medicine, then moved her to Croydon.

Are there any other pleasantly alliterative people I could nobble? What should I do if she meets someone with an awkward initial, like Z?