I would be able to take all of those pants off you for a small fee. Will you accept a check?

I mustn't destroy the world with my efficiency!
Recycling disposable pants
Dear Aunties,
I am a beauty therapist and I spend much of my time waxing rich people's fannies. We give the ladies who want a Brazilian wax, temporary paper pants to preserve their dignity while we tear away at their hair. I'd say I get through around four pairs a day.
My boss doesn't believe in recycling and the bin men refused to take the bucket of knickers I managed to smuggle home. But I don't want to belong to a profession that destroys forests! What is the point of women with beautifully smooth do-das, if we are all going to die anyway?
Please help - how can I continue my rage against pubic hair without sending my carbon footprint through the roof?
Nicki (19), Devon, UK
Tags: environment, work
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