Troubled couple shoulder to shoulder
"What is missing in our relationship?"
10.08.2008

Hubby won't make love anymore

Dear Aunties,

My husband hasn't had sex with me since 1999. I still love him but I feel so rejected and he won't open up to me about the problem so I am thinking of leaving him.

I simply don't understand it. We had such a good sex life until he went on holiday nine years ago and when he came back he wouldn't even so much as let me see him naked.

Since then I've tried cooking him oysters, making the house smell of ylang ylang and even serenading him with his favourite little nursery rhyme:

"Two little dicky birds sitting on a wall,

One named Peter, one named Paul.

Fly away Peter, fly away Paul,

Come back Peter, come back Paul!"

I'm worried that he has self-confidence issues so I keep telling him how much I like his body and reminding him of all the fun we used to have teabagging, but the gaping hole between us just seems to get bigger.

Why is he shutting me out like this? Will he ever make love to me again? Should I leave him?

Peg (40), North-West Lower Crockin
11.04.2009
Dear Peg,

You may find this letter somewhat enlightening, you callous, unobservant cow.

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