Showing problems tagged with farting
Scheming man and his bird
"I want her to leave me!"
17.09.2008

Make my girlfriend dump me

Dear Aunties,

Professor Tommy may indeed be right about my girlfriend being immortal and I'm afraid he may also be right about the nasty repercussions if I hurt her. Therefore I've decided that the best plan of attack would be to make her dump me.

However I have tried farting around her, pretending to support Bush, torching ants and speaking only in Catherine Tate impressions but my natural charm is still winning through.

How do you lose a girl?

Reply Edit
Bernard (27), Suffolk, UK
19.09.2008
Dear Bernard,

It's a little late to pretend you support Bush - why not pretend to support McCain, or better still, why not extol the virtues of Sarah Palin?

from Auntie Kaitlin
Tags: relationships
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parody , immortality , dilemma , problem page , question , relationships , advice , agony aunt , farting , dumping , torching ants , spoof , satire